May It Be So.

"Amen."

Amen is cool. You've probably heard that the literal translation of the word is, "let it be so."

I like that. It's almost like a review of everything you just prayed. Thinking back and saying yes, this is true, this is what I want. This is what I agree with.

So, what did I say in this week-long prayer? What do I walk away from this saying I believe in?

I believe that God is my Daddy, that He lives in Heaven, and that I can't wait to join Him. I believe that He is completely beyond anything I could imagine Him to be- holy.

I believe that the church needs to obey Him and work for the good of His Kingdom. I believe that we need to want what He wants, and do what He says.

I believe that God will give us what we need, especially the Forgiveness that is required for us to really have life.

I believe that we need to forgive other people the way God has forgiven us, so that we too can be fully forgiven. I also believe that forgiveness is extremely difficult.

I believe that we get tempted to do the wrong thing and we mess up, and I believe that God rescues us every time, and that He teaches us to be stronger.

I believe that we as a church are God's people and the citizens of His Kingdom, and that we belong fully to Him. I believe that God is strong enough to defend his children fiercely, and that He will utilize His power to do just that. I believe that God deserves all the honor we could ever give him, and that He is glorious enough to light up all of Heaven.

I believe.

May it be so.

This has been. . . a week.

About two or three days into this challenge I started feeling burned out. But Sabbath Rest takes effort. The rewards come later.

And I do feel more rested. I didn't really do anything this week, but I feel accomplished. Not because I figured something out or found a solution to a big problem, but because I stuck to a commitment and because I did something that matters. I did just one thing this week, and it was enough.

I want to continue with this- recognizing that God is enough. Our relationship is enough. If I accomplish nothing else in life, I want to be able to look back and say, "I loved God with my whole being and passion. It is enough."

Thank you for taking this little journey with me.

~Dolly

For Yours Is. . .

 ". . . For Yours is the Kingdom, the power, and the glory forever."

 I love this triumph as we get to the end of our prayer!

The Kingdom is us. We belong to God, and we as His church need to be ready to go and do whatever He had called us to. He needs workers that will be faithful and do their jobs. We have a mission to expand the boundaries of God's kingdom to where they belong.

Sometimes that's simple and great, but a lot of times it's hard and scary.

But God has power. He is stronger than anything we will ever have to face- even our own fear! He IS fighting on our behalf, and He WILL save us. I tend to be defeatist. But even I have to acknowledge that God has never failed me. The fact that I'm still on this earth instead of buried in it, speaks to His power in saving people.

He has power to save us, and He doesn't waste it.

And for that we glorify Him. Usually when we glorify something, we're making it seem better than it did before. We might even exaggerate to make said thing, whatever it is, seem really great. But the fun part of glorifying God is that we cannot exaggerate Him! All we can do is acknowledge the big, good, strong, sacrificial, just, merciful, creative, . . . holy. . . God that He is. And because He is so incredibly other, we will never run out of things to praise Him for!

Which is weird, cuz I run out of things to say all the time.

Actually, I just don't start, usually.

You know, I've often found that when I do start glorifying God, I get on a roll.

But I think that for myself, getting stuck down here is a big problem. I often get in places where all I can see is gray, and glory doesn't really seem to be a thing that actually exists anywhere. What joy? If He's powerful, why do I feel trapped? If He's so other, so beyond, then why am I so confined by my circumstances?

But when I make myself acknowledge what is true and good, the gray gets cleared away, just a bit, and I can catch a small glimpse into the warm, golden, glorious light of Heaven. Then I can start to see the holiness of God, and as I continue, glorifying God is less of a chore and more of a helpless honor. I am privileged to be able to walk straight up to God, in His throne room, for Pete's sake! and talk to Him. And once I see Him there, just being who He Is, how can I do anything except ascribe glory to Him? Because it's all true.

I belong to Him. He is glorious enough to deserve all my praise. He is powerful- stronger than everything.

That's all.

~Dolly

Deliver Us From Evil

"Don't lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one."

One of the biggest things that changes for God's people as we follow Him, is that sin loses its allure. It makes sense: sin is anything that goes against God, so I can't choose to follow Him and willfully fight against Him at the same time.

But then comes the subject of temptation- wanting to do something that is sin. Temptation is hard because it can take our view off of Jesus, and then sin can start to look good. Things get pushed out of perspective.

It can be so hard because I really do want to serve God, I really do love Him. And I really, really don't wanna sin and mess up my ability to do those things! But I get tired, or I just don't wanna put in the effort to resist temptation. Or I get so used to certain sins, or I get things mixed all up and start to believe I'm helpless to this- that there is no alternative to giving up.

And then I mess up and it's really frustrating, because I know exactly where I went wrong, and I'd change it, but now I can't.

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has seized you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful. He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear, but with the temptation will also provide a way out, so that you can stand up under it.

So it's possible to do the right thing, to stand against my own habits and the lies that are being whispered to me silently.

It's just really hard.

So, God, I know I'm gonna be tempted. But when I'm walking into a trap, could you steer me away from it? I think that's what the first phrase means.

The second phrase is also really important.

I used to belong to Satan, sort of. Not rightfully, exactly, but I was his. His property, his slave, unable to stop myself from doing things I hated and being someone I couldn't stand.

Then God swooped in and rescued me! And life has been an adventure of sorts ever since.

But sometimes I find myself wandering back to the familiar, old places without even realizing. Before I know what's up, I get all tangled up and trapped where I used to be. I find myself doing things I don't want to, or not doing the things I should do. I might even start to believe that I was always like this, that I never really changed, even after being with God for so long.

But it's not true!

And God reminds me that I really don't belong here. That I have a better place to be at, and that I can go there anytime. His power is available to me. He will save me again, get me out of my present circumstances and back to where I belong.

Deliver me from my enemy.

And give me strength not to go back so easily next time. He can save me from needing to be saved! THAT is true deliverance: not needing to go back anymore.

I think God saves me all the time by teaching me how to stay free.

~Dolly

Who've Sinned Toward Us

 ". . . And forgive our sins as we forgive those who have sinned toward us."

 I have a lot of sins. Like defeatism. And apathy. Maybe a little self-righteousness. Sometimes I'm judgemental. Sometimes I don't stand up for truth. Oh, and sometimes I'm really, really ungrateful.

But those don't even compare to what other people have done to me and to the people I love.

Churches that hurt my family deeply. People who completely betrayed my trust and threw it in my face. Even that girl in middle school who tried to push me around. And the kid at my old youth group who made fun of me.

People who've betrayed me, lied to me, hurt me.

Sometimes I catch myself hoping that they'll suffer too.

Except. . .

I was forgiven. I was forgiven for giving in to my circumstances. I've been forgiven for letting things be when I really needed to grow. I was forgiven for lying to myself that I'm better than anybody else, and for thinking of other people as unworthy of my attention or God's love. Forgiven both for judging people and for being a coward about their opinions. Forgiven for my insane ingratitude- something so blown out of proportion that I actually thought that life wasn't a privilege from God, but a curse to be ended.

I am a sinner!

So are they.

People who lied, people who divided, people who backstabbed and betrayed. People who refuse to change, people who want to cause others pain.

Sinners.

They deserve to be punished! They deserve to be hurt, to suffer!

I was hurt. I suffered.

Sometimes I still do. Like right now, going over it all again.

I need to forgive to be forgiven. But it hurts! Like poking at a raw wound.

Forgiveness is messy.

When I was talking to my cousin Daisi about this, she had a thought. And then I had a thought. And our combined thoughts added up to this:

When someone sins against me, they owe me a debt for that hurt. The problem is, some people don't change, and that debt will never be paid off. But God is a debt-taker. He is willing to give me the healing that I need - to pay that debt and then some. The debt doesn't go away without repentance. Instead, God now holds the receipt. A purposely sinful, hurtful person still owes a debt. All that happens to them is that the person they owe just got a lot more intimidating.

What happens to me is that I find healing. Slowly, but it's still there.

Justice will still be served. If the person repents, God will forgive the debt. But if the person doesn't admit they messed up, doesn't want to change anything, then God can deal with them. It's not my problem.

The hard part of forgiving is handing over the receipt, letting the other person not owe you. But honestly, it's a lead receipt. I know. It's really, really, reeeaaaalllllyyy heavy. I have a right to carry it. But i also have the privilege not to.

God's strong enough to carry it for me.

So I forgive them. Again.

~Dolly

Our Daily Bread

"Give us, today, the bread we need."

This is literally a prayer for our needs to be met. That's it. Simple, right?

So, I see the word "bread" and think of practical, everyday needs.

But Jesus said that people can't live on just bread by itself: we live on the very Words coming out of God's mouth. 'Needs' here also means the things we need to hear God say.

We are forgiven. That's what He says, so it must be true. And apparently forgiveness is something we need, because it's put in the same sentence here. Actually, asking for daily bread is kind of a 'Part 1 of 2' thing- it's paired with ". . . And forgive our sins, as we forgive the people who've sinned toward us."

So, why is forgiveness so important? What's the big deal? Why do we need it so much?

I was actually talking to my cousin Daisi last night, and the whole forgiveness thing was brought up. What does it mean when God says He forgives us?

She brought up the idea of God taking on someone's debt, and something clicked for me.

There is no way I can undo my mistakes, or fix the hurt I've caused other people, or pay for my sin. There is no possible way for me to pay that debt. The only thing I could do would be to die. Then, at least I wouldn't be causing more problems. It's the only way to pay what I owe.

But, just like any debt, all that matters is that it gets paid. The person paying the debt doesn't have to be the same person who owes it, all that matters is that the debt is paid.

So God took my debt, and He paid it. He died. The debt had been paid, I no longer owe.

And that's forgiveness.

That's why it's important, that's why it's one of the most basic needs of the human race, that's why it's my daily bread.

Every day, it's true. I am forgiven. You are forgiven. Period.

We can live in freedom- there's no more death threat having over our heads! And even when we mess up again, because of course we will, we can go to God and He can say, "I already paid for that." Because He did.

It's awesome.

~Dolly

Your Will be Done

 ". . . Your Kingdom come, Your will be done on earth like it is in Heaven."

This is where things start to get confusing. I mean, God's Kingdom is never explained completely in the Bible. And how am I supposed to know what His will is?

I'm not a theologian- at least, not formally trained or anything.  But even I can see that this is surrender.

I think praying for God's Kingdom to come is kinda like praying for His big-picture plan. You know, where He comes to rule over the nations and where everyone admits that He's God. I tend to get in a rut really easily, expecting each day to be the same, letting the world go by. But God's got big stuff planned. Huge! Trumpets,-lights-earthquakes-bodies-rising kind of huge! Things aren't just fine the way they are. Change is coming! And I should be praying for it, looking forward to whatever God's got planned, instead of sitting around letting things be.

The other part of God Kingdom, though, is already happening. We as a church represent the current Earth sector of it. So, I see praying for the church to be ready, to be getting her warrior game on, as also praying for God's Kingdom to come. (I.e. Be present here, Be active here.) There are plenty of hopeless, hurting people just looking for some good news. And, like the apostle Paul said, how can they hear if no one goes and tells them about it? That's why the church needs to be constantly energized and empowered by God's Spirit. We're in a battle, fighting for what was stolen from our King forever ago in the Garden of Eden. We need help.

And then there's the matter of God's will. What does He want? Sometimes I have such a hard time with this! But there are some things that are always true, and always God's will, just because they're part of who He is! I often start there, and as I'm praying, if God wants me to pray something specific, He'll tell me. Sometimes really bold things have come out of my mouth and kinda shocked me, because I used to be pretty timid with God. But they always came true, which served to grow my faith a little bigger, help me be a little bolder, and proved God's power to myself and others.

Back to my earlier point, these things are always true:

God wants relationship with people. He wants to save them from their miserableness and teach them what love means.

God wants the church to grow. Not just in numbers, God also wants us to grow up, in a way. He wants leaders with integrity, workers with dependability, and people of faithful passion to work together in unity, with Him in charge.

God wants us to learn, individually. We're all on a journey, cliche as that is, and we need to go to Him for help finding our way. Whatever you know you're getting lax on in your relationship with God, talk to Him about it. I know I tend to have trouble making time or investing energy to actually participate in devotions. I tend to just read a chapter in my Bible, maybe read in a devotional book a bit, and call it good. I don't always try to actually understand what's going on. That's honestly why I'm doing this Lord's Prayer thing: to recalibrate, start a habit of intentionally hanging out with God and listening to, not just talking at, Him.

Often as I pray about the things I am certain of, God will add to them. As I'm praying for people to accept Him as the Great God that He is, names will come to mind out of the blue. Or I'll suddenly realize the true importance of a community issue, and pray for the church's effective involvement. Or I'll have a  random epiphany that the Lord's Prayer would be perfect for a week-long personal study! 😁

Obviously, not everyone is wired the way I am! But I would suggest that if you're having trouble deciphering God's will on something, start with what You know. Once your heart is open and surrendered, it's a LOT easier to hear what He's saying.

I hope this makes sense! May we all be able to come to God with surrendered confidence.

~Dolly

Our Father...

"Our Father, Who is in Heaven, holy is Your Name." 

The beginning of this prayer is about acknowledging what is true.
First of all, God is Father. Daddy. Papa. He is mine. 

We have this crazy close bond because, for some reason, He adopted me! With my faults and insecurities and mistakes and fears, He has accepted me; body, soul and spirit. I am wholly, entirely, completely loved. No matter what I do or say.

I was a sinner.

I am a child.

The next phrase is about where home is: it's where my Daddy is, and where I long to be. 

Sometimes I just get such an intense empti-full-ness, because honestly, life stinks. It's miserable and draining and utterly discouraging sometimes. I feel like a wanderer here, and I just want to go home!  To curl up in my Daddy's arms and cry out all the hurt and sorrow I collected on this broken little rock, and when I'm all done, He will wipe away my tears and say, "You did well, little one. Come into my joy, and just rest." 

In apparent contrast with this image of our Daddy, is the reminder that He is holy. 
Although He has accepted us as children, He is still perfect. He's completely beyond. Outside. Separate. 

Beyond anything we can imagine or will ever experience here. Outside any boundaries that we little humans try to set. Separate from the sin that pervades the atmosphere here on Earth. In summary, God is more. More big. More powerful. More glorious. More brilliant. More everything. Holy.

So, today I run to my Daddy's arms. And I talk, like a little kid, about how big He is; and I recognize the ridiculous privilege I have by being His.

He is great. I am small. 

Despite the contrast, we fit. 

I am His.

And that's where everything starts. This small set of phrases is the great perspective-shifter.

Without this, I can super easily get everything all out of whack. I can forget my rights as a child,  and come cowering, begging for forgiveness. Or I can forget that God actually has power to make sure His will is done here like it is in Heaven. Or I can take everything for granted, forgetting that if mercy wasn't a thing, God's holiness would demand that sin be entirely wiped out, and I would be obliterated since I am (was?) a sinner.

There's a reason Jesus started His prayer this way. It's because these truths are the beginning of everything. They're like glasses lenses: without them things kinda start to lose focus.

 "Our Father, Who is in Heaven, holy is Your Name."

"Thank You that I can come to You like a little kid; thank You that You are my Daddy. I can't wait to see You completely someday, all wrapped up in glory in the big Heaven You live in. I can't even imagine what I'll see there- what You'll be like. I mean, You're completely beyond my little sphere of experience. You're perfect! I don't always get why You love me, but I'm thankful that it's true, and that nothing can ever change this fact. I love You too."

~Dolly

Challenged!

Last night I was at a Bible study, and we talked about the importance of 'The Lord's Prayer'. I was reminded of when I was younger, and I used to use it as a very direct guide for my praying. I would recite the prayer line by line, and after each line I would add my own take on it, kind of. For instance, when saying, "give us today our daily bread," I would continue by telling God about my needs. Or, when asking God to "forgive our sins as we forgive those who sin toward us," I would bring up my own sins, and the ways that other people had hurt me.

Last night while at the Bible study, or maybe soon afterwards, I had another thought. You know, the Lord's Prayer is broken up into seven pieces. More or less. And I just had a thought, that maybe I could sort of recalibrate my prayer life, by taking a day to focus on each of the seven points. Sort of like a week-long devotional. That I write as I go along.

In conjunction with the idea, as I thought about it more, I started thinking about how I honestly don't post on this blog very much. I have trouble disciplining myself, especially in things that run more on inspiration rather than calculated thinking. So, why not document my thoughts as I go through the Lord's Prayer, and just upload them, one piece or two at a time? So that's what I'm going to be doing. If you want, you can check back each day to see where I'm at, or you can come back at the end of the week and read through all of the posts in order. When I'm done, I will post them in chronological order on the sidebar.

However this thing goes down, I appreciate you guys taking this journey with me! Thanks for supporting me even though I don't post on here that much.

With love to you all,

~Dolly.